It is heartbreaking to see the frustration, anger, and depression that comes when someone gets done pulling their hair out, and they feel hopeless. It can destroy them emotionally because they see it as a reflection on who they are. Everything comes down to whether or not they had control over trich today. If they didn’t, they decide that they are worthless. This upsets me. We have gotten so far away from where our identity comes from, that this is where we end up.
The bible is super specific. Our identity comes from the Lord. He directs our path. He breathes life into our lungs. He is the one that decides our destiny, gives us our spiritual gifts, and blesses us with good things. If our identity lies there, bald spots take a back seat. People’s opinions lose their power. Relapse is a temporary setback. Beauty comes from something Real. Relationship is no longer built on how much someone can feed my ego. Truth is set in stone. Intimacy is deep and satisfying. Fear is replaced by Unconditional Love.
When we hear “Love your neighbor as yourself”, we usually concentrate on the concept of loving our neighbor. We put that in the front, and brush away the “as yourself” part. According to this scripture, loving our neighbor reflects how much we are able to love ourselves. If we hate ourselves, how much are we going to love our neighbor? Obviously, there is a strong importance in loving ourselves and how we were created.
The enemy is continuously working to kill us off. If he can’t kill us, he will try to cripple us by stealing our very identity. By consuming us with what we are NOT, so that we forget who God created us to be. His goal is to make us so afraid of stepping into our position as Heir to the Throne, with all of the authority and power that comes with that. The enemy comes to kill, steal, and destroy. Bill Johnson from Bethel Church in Redding, CA says that the good thing is, the enemy tips his hand ALL THE TIME. He gets too big for his britches and reveals his plan.
I have to put all of my time, energy, and focus into letting God define me. I need to soak up His words, change the things in me that aren’t from Him, and removing the things that grieve Him. Trichotillomania doesn’t grieve the heart of God. I’m not in the wrong here. I’m not dealing with a lack of faith. I’m not hiding a secret sin that is keeping me from healing. What grieves the heart of the Father is when His children place more importance and “truth” in men than in Him. It’s idolatry, plain and simple. I idolize man when I seek their opinion over God. THAT is what grieves the heart of God. I refuse to be accused of that. It is through God’s strength that I continue to fight trich.