New Baby

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We welcomed our fourth child into the world on May 13th.  Rachel Sophia is a beautiful, healthy girl, weighing 7lbs. 6oz at birth.  I fell in love right away.  She has big blue eyes and dark hair.  All four of my kids have different color hair.  Brooke, my seven year old, has dirty blonde hair. Alexandria, my 4 year old, has very red hair.  Mark, my 19 month old has strawberry blonde hair.  Six week old Rachel has the darkest hair of all.  They are all uniquely beautiful, yet you can tell they are siblings. I am a very proud mama and am so happy I get to be home with my kids.

When I had Mark, I was still teaching and had to go back to work when he was only two months old.  Those were the hardest months of my life.  I felt torn, like I wasn’t being a good enough mother, wife, or teacher.  There just wasn’t enough of my to go around.  Now, I can devote my attention to my children and husband.  I make enough money tutoring a few hours per week to cover my school loans.  I hope to get more jobs as it would be great to make a living at tutoring, It is something I love, and it allows me to make my own schedule.

May and June have been good months in terms of pulling (I know June is not over yet, but I’m on a good streak).  I’ve had many more good days than bad days lately; although I have not had a totally pull free day in weeks.  I have mostly left my hair alone or stopped myself after only a few strands.  Thank goodness because it’s so thin on top and it is growing in soo slow. I have still been pulling my eyelashes and eyebrows.  Although I want to stop that as well, I’m happy to be doing better with my scalp.  The eyelashes and eyebrows are a much older habit that will be harder to break.  As I have time and again.  I can go months without touching my hair, but have never made it more than a few weeks with my lashes and brows.

I am proud to have done so well considering my extreme lack of sleep and stress over dealing with a high maintenance baby.  With my 3 previous babies I have suffered from postpartum depression and anxiety, along with increased pulling.  I’ve been a little down, but it is much better than in the past.I am using all my strategies to try and combat depression and anxiety and am doing well.  I am taking magnesium, EPA, inositol and NAC.  All of these are safe when breastfeeding and are beneficial to the baby.

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